There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
