thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
