This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize