thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
