I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
My breasts were aching with rage.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
