a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
you will always have a special place in my vag
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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