that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
