Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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