Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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