wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Randomize
