I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
