Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
