I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
