So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
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