Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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