You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
