I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
