I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize