Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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