Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
