If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
look no pants
my mouth tastes like poor choices
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
