things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
