i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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