We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Randomize
