her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Randomize
