I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
