we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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