I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
