windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
