brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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