6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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