Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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