from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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