I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
