So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
