The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
