I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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