Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
