you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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