lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
