Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
