I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Randomize
