i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
