We're like a lot better than the average bears
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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