Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
