You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
