We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
My dick has a subreddit
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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