he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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