Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
