love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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