He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Vodka?
Forever.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
