I must be too annoying 4 u.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
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