He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Randomize
